Week 7: Happy Valentine's Day!

Last week's group focused on the important question:

"If your best friend were exactly in your situation, what would you do to support him/her?"

It's not an easy question. How do we support anyone? What do we say or do when a friend is struggling?

As always, our talented group of truly gifted individuals had plenty of ideas. Here's a sample:

"Take it slowly, and be happy with the progress you make. Any progress is better than none. Think about how weight loss will enrich your life. It'll be hard, but you can do it. Keep yourself honest: write down your food and exercise daily. Make sure your relationships are with people, not with food."

 

"I love you just as you are, but I understand this is painful. You are not alone. I believe in you and will help you in any way I can. I care about you and want you to succeed. You can do this! It's a process, and it makes sense to make small changes slowly. Remember, you can't change forty years of habits in a blink!"

 

 

"Many people equate more and better food with more and better success! Let go of this idea. Bring the same intent and quality to your food and lifestyle that do bring to you professional work."



 

 

"I would ask her what she needs to feel supported, rather than giving her what I think she needs. I would try not to pass judgement, and give her honest feedback - if she asked for it."

 

"I would tell her to: 1) trust her gut, 2) play to her strengths, 3) maintain the behaviors that support her weight management, like exercise, and 4) have the courage to follow the message, "Do the best you can and love will back you up!"

 

 

***

 

Well, no surprise. This exercise is a therapy tool. Of course, your "best friend" could and should be you! So on this Valentine's Day, think of this exercise. Not just as it applies to weight management -but as it applies to the many ways in which we support ourselves, or perhaps, miss the opportunity to do so.

 

I'll be in Thailand this coming week for the WPATH conference, so no group on February 13. On February 20, our group member and colleague, Donna Henderson, has graciously agreed to facilitate the group. Thank you, Donna.

 

Have a wonderful week, and make sure you get yourself a supportive Valentine's Day treat! Just like you'd do for your best friend!

 

We're all in this together.

Linda Gromko, MD